Disclaimer Stargate Sg-1 and its characters are the property of Stargate (II) Productions, Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. This story is for entertainment purposes only and no money exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author. This story may not be posted elsewhere without the consent of the author.

Written for the SamCarterDrabbleathon

A collection of drabbles and ficlets based on various prompts

Sam, Casualty

Sam's boots clanged as she tiredly walked down the ramp, doing her best to not drag her feet and trip herself up.

"Colonel, Jacob," Hammond greeted as he walked into the gateroom. He scanned them with his eyes and she knew what he was doing.

Taking a head count.

"Daniel and Jacob's part went okay. But we ran into a little trouble." O'Neill briefed as he handed over his weapon.

"The goa'uld hit our planet and I think there's a lot of dead Tok'ra," Jacob said. "Along with a lot of dead Jaffa."

"Is there any assistance we can provide?" Hammond asked.

"We can use some search and rescue teams," her dad said. "The symbiote poison took care of the Jaffa, but there may be some Tok'ra still trapped in the tunnels that might have survived.

Hammond nodded. "We'll continue this up in my office. In the meantime, Major Carter, Doctor Jackson, why don't you two head up to the infirmary."

Sam nodded as she reached into her pocket, pulling out two bits of metal. "Major Mansfield and Lieutenant Elliott," she said, handing the dog tags over to the man.

Hammond respectfully took them from her. "I'll make sure the recovery team knows to look for them and the other casualties."

Sam nodded, biting her tongue to keep from saying that they weren't casualties, they were men.

Sam and Cam and Pants

At first, Cam didn't notice that anything was amiss. The next day, he just thought that it was odd and that maybe he was tireder than usual.

By the third day, he was getting downright puzzled.

On the fourth day, when he found them perched neatly in the middle of his dining room table, he knew that something was up.

It took him until the sixth day to track down the pants fairy and that was only after an overheard conversation in the gym.

With the latest pair of crisp blue BDU's clutched in his fist, he marched into her lab, her grin his confirmation. "My desk, my locker, the trunk of my car, my gym bag and my dining room?" he asked, holding the pants up and shaking them in a mock threat.

Unrepentant, she grinned. "If you're gonna keep losing them, the least I can do is make sure that you always have a spare."

Sam and Geek Sam, Awkward

As soon as she stepped through the gate, she knew. And Sam still wasn't sure if it was good or bad that her alternate universe radar was so finely honed.

She endured the medical poking and prodding with her mind and attention focused on how to get back and undo whatever had been done.

She even rolled with the changes, not batting an eye at Danielle Jackson and Colonel Paul Davis. General Jack O'Neill barely tweaked her interest and seeing a photo of Janet's grandson just reminded her to have a chat with Cassie about condoms.

She smoothly accepted the alternate version of herself, barely making a face at the sensible shoes, tweed skirt and butt ugly mustard colored sweater the poor thing was wearing. Although, after the fifth time the woman crinkled her nose to push up her horn rimmed glasses, Sam DID have to fight the urge to NOT ask to take a photo to show her own Colonel O'Neill the next time he called her a geek.

No. All in all, Sam rolled with the punches for the three days she was trapped in the alternate universe.

Except.

The last night, stumbling back to her own VIP quarters at 0300 after figuring out how to fix things, she opened the wrong door and stared, unable to tear her eyes away from the sight of her frumpy self thoroughly screwing the brains out of one General O'Neill.

Embarrassed, Sam backed out of the room, praying that they'd been too busy to notice her.

Yeah, tomorrow was going to be awkward.

Sam & Jack, Mud

Firm and round, annoyingly masked by heavy green canvas. Sam's fingers twitched as her eyes admired the rhythmic flex of muscles as he walked.

She sighed, glancing furtively at Daniel and Teal'c, walking far ahead, before she picked up the pace, easily catching up.

Before she could change her mind, she reached out, flicking the firm flesh, her fingertips grazing his ass lightly.

"Carter?" He turned, clearly startled and moderately amused.

"Mud, sir." She shook her hand. "You had mud...there."

Ignoring his frown, she fell back. Yep, she'd guard that rear any day of the week.

Sam & Jonas and Sex

"You're not serious?" Sam asked, looking around for the guys. This had to be a joke.

"Why wouldn't I be serious?" Jonas asked, snagging an uneaten French fry off her plate.

"Jonas, you're what? Thirty-five?"

"Earth years. But Kelowna's rotation around the sun is shorter than Earth's so I'm forty there."

"And you've never had sex?"

He shook his head. "The genders are segregated for schooling and then I went straight into the University and then the Government program." He shrugged. "Doctor Kieran was looking for a genetically suitable mate for me."

Sam nodded slowly, raising her hand to massage her forehead. "Jonas..." She looked up. "It would probably be best if you don't tell Colonel O'Neill about this...or anyone else for that matter." He stared at her. "Just trust me," she said.

A forty year old virgin. The next thing she knew, they'd be inviting Ba'al over for dinner.

Sam, Lorne, Zelenka and Rubiks Cube

A familiar clicking sound caught Evan's attention as he made his way across the cafeteria. Spying Colonel Carter - he just couldn't wrap his tongue around Sam now that she was his boss - and Zelenka seated at a table, he joined them. "Colonel, Doctor."

"Major." Carter smiled at him as Zelenka barely grunted, his attention fixated on the game in his hands. "Early lunch?"

"Yeah. Lieutenant Hendrix wants to have a racquetball game this afternoon so..." He shrugged.

"Not fun on a full stomach," she said.

"You play?"

She shook her head. "No. I'm not much into any sport that needs a ball."

Zelenka muttered in Czech as he worked a Rubiks cube, his fingers twisting the toy so hard Evan feared that it'd break.

"New training?" Evan asked motioning towards the other two cubes setting on the table, both as thoroughly scrambled as the one in Zelenka's hands.

"His niece and nephews got these for Christmas," Carter explained. "After six months, they've send them for Uncle Radek to solve."

Zelenka cursed some more and tossed the toy down in disgust. "Impossible," he growled, picking up his fork. "Why buy the toys if they cannot solve them?" He viciously stabbed a piece of meat and shoved it into his mouth. "Why not blocks? Blocks are classic."

"Probably because they're boring," Carter said as Evan abandoned his sandwich to pick up the discarded cube.

"There are millions of combinations," Zelenka said, gesturing with his fork.

"Billions," Carter corrected.

"Really?"

She nodded and tilted her head, picking up one of the cubes to trace her fingers over its surface, tapping them gently. "43,252,003,274,489,856,004," she said after a few minutes.

"That's not right," Zelenka said, picking up the other one.

"Yes, it is."

Zelenka shook his head. "No. That's not right. 43,252,003,274,489,856,000," he said triumphantly.

She nodded. "You're right. I forgot to carry the six."

"A Czech invented this." He held up the cube.

"No, he did not."

"Yes, he did. Erno Rubik."

"He was Hungarian," Carter said.

"NO."

"Radek, it was on one of those quiz shows the last time I went home," she said.

"His parents were Czech," he said, his tone slightly petulant.

"There's an easy way to solve this thing."

"I will NOT peel off the stickers," he said, making a move to grab it from her.

"Why not? All the sides will be the same color, puzzle solved." She shrugged. "Then again, people notice that. Just take it apart."

"Take it---Colonel, these belong to my niece and nephews."

"They'll never know."

"I'll know."

"Then buy them new ones."

"They'll know that too."

The last row settled into place and Evan set the cube down on the table, interrupting their discussion. The two scientists broke off and stared at the finished puzzle.

"How did you---" Zelenka sputtered.

"It's not that hard," Evan said as he got to his feet. He picked up his tray and ambled out of the cafeteria, whistling tunelessly between his teeth.

Feedback:sky_diver119@yahoo.com

HOME